Precious silence

We live in the world of words. People talk and think in words. When we walk or read the signs, browse the internet and many other activities; they would be done at least with some words too. Without being too wordy, I would like to summarize that we live with the fact that we need to communicate, mostly with words both spoken, symbolized or written. But great care should be taken if we don't want that words have impact that we don't intend to.

At least that is what I have been dealing with these past few days. I always love to hear sharing from my students, or their wonders about how the world works. However at least two of them used that opportunity a bit too much. They forgot about care also means to listen and to give others chance to be heard. Too much is always not impressive. This habit of sharing experiences, jokes and fun can no longer be fun without wise consideration of time and place.

After talking to them personally about this problem, these two beloved students and I made agreement. This is more into discipline that they need to carry out. It is in the form of challenge for them: they need to practice one skill that they would have never thought before! They just need to be silent for one day. They are required to use no words or as minimal as possible. In any case of urgency, they need to 'talk' by using sign language.

The purpose of this exercise besides to practice their self-control, is also to make them reflect how precious is the chance to talk-- and to listen! People can take for granted the ability to speak and to tell words anytime they want. But when we are aware that there is restriction, we tend to realize that we need to think before one word can be spoken.

Yeah. You can guess. That was not too easy at first, but after some deals of consequences, they made it today! How beautiful and how natural they are. When they have enjoyed and even savored silence, they preferred it over distractions. Even I myself was so amazed with such sudden change in their behavior and attitude and capability to accept and process instructions! That's real magic.

What a learning for me especially. How in this life  we need to appreciate precious silence. After being so encouraged by how silence can clarify and direct attention of my students, I challenge myself as well to practice it for spiritual benefit. We need to be still to know that He is God over all. A still mind a strong one, because it can focus and be very persistent in good things. What about gently remind ourselves to stay still and remember God from time to time, so that we can be moved by His love and lovely visit. Thus our heart becomes a sharp and mindful one, to be a good soil for love to grow.
Let us be silent and pray more; for prayers are the roots of beauty and love. 

Strength unknown

While thinking about roles, I suddenly comes to the thoughts of the uniqueness of each person. I mean, even people with the same occupation respond differently to some circumstances. For example, my friend and I are responding pretty differently toward the same student's  behavior in the same class. What a beauty! I love to ponder how God works through different personalities and uniqueness. And in term of roles, I am captivated how God's grace is sufficient for us whatever our responsibilities and challenges might be

.

It is easy to be tempted to be discontent of our situation. We might wish to live a better and happier life, getting rid off those itchiness and lame reality that we silently hide. Especially these days when people gets much easier access to the 'better you' workshop and market. We want to 'succeed', 'free', 'look better', just mention it. We might also painfully fight our own ugly self, which we consciously start to get exhausted out of. But somehow when I reflect on this, if we interview anyone comes to us, there must be something that they are discontent about. Well, no wonder, brothers and sisters. Since our expulsion from Eden, we don't live in the perfect world. We are in the exile. Our true abide is in the Lord as prophet David often put it beautifully in his Psalms. 

What we don't realize in this case, however is the fact that God is persistent in His goodness toward us. We become too much focus on the misery or those little imperfections we have to bear. 'Worldly cares' as pious people put it, overtake us and we miss the most important point of clinging to Christ in trust and faith. Somehow, we pursue those good things earnestly and to improve ourselves to be much better person. That is great actually. But we need to ask why and for what do we do all those things? Is it out of our fear and shame, our longing to be accepted and looked upon by others? Beware of anything driven by shame and fear, because those two roots bears bitter fruits. To be honest, so many times, I fell  into this very pit. I wish a taller and brighter body, smarter and cooler me, etc. But then I remind myself: when God creates you, He remembers.

As He is persistent in His goodness, He works in and through us. So many times, he doesn't work despite our weakness, rather through our weaknesses. The good news is, we don't have to be someone else. God wants us to be us: Yes, with all possible weaknesses and cracks that is in us. Do you remember the image of mud in the hand of the potter? Our job is just to cling on him and not to be too self-conscious. We simply obey and be grateful, and trusting our life in His persistent goodness. Now, can you feel which force drive you into repentance and renewal of a better you? Our old self demands the renewal of outer circumstances; bigger house, more money and glory for ourselves... The root for that is shame, fear and insecurity. But our new self accepts what God has been working through: whether it's poverty, discomfort, trials, or anything in such humble way that what concerns us is our love toward Christ grows day by day. It is the result of our longing toward our Truest Lover and Home, Christ, for whom we are created. That is a life of repentance. A life dedicated and directed in the seeking of kingdom of God. 

May our heart be warmed by His amazing love and responding to His calling. After reading this, all those little annoyances might still be with you. Yet, what can overcomes the joy and peace in acknowledging, even God's glory is revealed through them just like in the story of the blind healed by the Lord. Be it our awkwardness, specific weaknesses that you don't want anyone to know. But God knows and God allows it for us to face. He gives us His grace, a strength unknown to keep moving and and to bear our cross. And through that very narrow road, we find ourselves in the footstep of Greatest King of all. Be thankful. Cry for mercy from above. Rejoice in Him. Remember, He is persistent in His goodness now and until you change into His likeness, as you cling on Him.    

  

It takes courage

This week, I encountered one person with such moving story. Mujito, a Javanese from Lampung happened to tell about his determination of having to take his beloved wife to the hospital in the town from small village. That was going on for about 13 months under such pressures of all those around him, all tlling him to simply give up. But somehow, he recalled for me, "I was so determined, there is such faith inside me that my wife would be well."

I simply sighed in admiration for his brilliant character. He lives in a very remote area in Lampung, with a piece of land to till and some flocks to tend to. One unexpected occasion, his wife was paralyzed and got some kind of strange sickness. By using his scooter motorbike, he faithfully sought for the cure of his wife's illness. Needless to say, it took about 2 hours ride one way to the hospital in such bumpy roads. Once a while, he found out his wife already passed out behind him and he needed to stop to let his wife took the journey for herself.

Please remember, that was going on for 13 months in and out of hospital. All his family member who at first showed their support gave in at certain point. While his wife's family seeing all the expenses he needed to carry out, consider that he simply didn't have to 'waste' his resources. With all this spinning around his side, yet he decided to keep going!! And see, his wife is pretty healthy and strong by the time he told this story to me.

And that is love! Love is so persistent. It is gentle but so stubborn. Mujito loves his wife and that's why he didn't just give up in the first obstacle. He keeps going on no matter what. Until he sees something good happen to his wife. That his wife is cured, well and sound. Realizing that this is a real story told by real person shatters my soul. If a man can do such thing, then how our God is! He keeps loving us, curing and restoring us no matter what.

In the other side of coin, it speaks to me so clearly: be persistent in faith, be persistent in hope and ultimately, be persistent in love.  How many times cultures and all those around us fail us and brings us down? Remember this story, which is an icon of story of Christ. How many times people whom you love so dearly failed and betrayed your feeling somehow: remember this story. How many times you feel unintentional disgust of some persons or group, no matter how hard you try to suppress that thing? Love is persistent. Sometimes it is like 'blind, deaf, mute, foolish' to the world. But that what it is: loving and loving and loving.

How can we explain or elaborate this? It is mystery. It is God-driven. It is a gift of grace. The very desire to keep standing in love is grace. And his grace made perfect in our weaknesses, failures and awkwardness's. But lest we forget that we are here for that: to be the image --and here we are, image of God. What does that means? Before all else, to love all being just as God is love. Why then it's so hard? Because we are supposed to rely on His power and not on our own. Doesn't he say 'with God all things is possible' and 'Abide in me', 'Come to me'?

It takes courage to have faith to such invitation and to leave the world behind. It takes courage to leave behind our doubts and fears and to embrace faith in moving through hardship. It takes courage to be persistent and be stubborn in trusting God's love is sovereign over all. And you know, behind that courage is grace, sufficient to cover all possible weaknesses and failures we could ever tell. So, go in faith and look at every person sent to us with the eye of love.