Trusting in His Holy Will

Two days ago, I spent a little time in the afternoon to go to a nearby bookstore with my friends. As usual, as we arrived in the bookstore, the best selling books in the eta lase are those of self-building skills or alike, as well as the 'motivational books', 'success book, etc. which consist of suggestions and tips to make the self better or happier, with a presupposition that the time belongs to oneself, and even anything can be under one self's control and for the self. For the first sight, it seems so good , but as I looked deeper, I realized that the motivation for those kinds of self-improvements, self-esteem or any other 'self-programs' can establish a self-centered heart and mind by manipulating things for our sakes, that is, "I want everything and everyone to say 'yes' to me, and if I don't get it. the way I want it, then I struggle mightily with anger and depression. And this is called 'selfish misery' (Father John Moses).

And yesterday, I read a very awesome sermon of Father John Moses, Orthodox pastor of All Saints of North America Russian Orthodox Church (ROCOR) which reminds me that the focus of our Christian life is on Christ, therefore:

"... True struggle is to say no to every aspect of selfish misery- to ambition, pride, anger, depression, avarice, gluttony, acquisitiveness, lust, fear, anxiety, laziness, despair, vainglory, etc. Fundamentally, it is saying no to the whole issue "self-fulfillment." The Lord said, "He who tries to find himself will lose himself, but he who loses himself for My sake will find himself."

And some moment ago, I read one verse among very beautiful Psalms of the day. This realizes me that it is not me who tried hard to be 'good' or have to do something for God to love us, rather it is because of His Love that He embraces us to Himself and transform us into His Likeness.

"Commit your fate to Yahweh,
trust in him and he will act:
making your virtue clear as the light,
your integrity as bright as noon". Psalm 37:5-6 JB

Yes, only in Him and in submitting ourselves to His Holy Will in everything, even for the unforeseen events; to follow Him wherever He leads us with confidence in Him embracing all that happens to us as a blessing of divine disguise by His secret hands, then He will work through us and we find our true humanity. How joyful and wonderful yet trembling it is to always remember that we are in the holy presence of God!

Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of God, have mercy on me a sinner!