I am thinking about how busy I am these months and even in this week. But if I think it twice this is not my body that is tired but my mind, caused by my own self-talk, or my friends they are my own fear, doubt, worries and many other friends. Lord have mercy. Those kind of preoccupation in to my limited memory and exhausted me. Oh... I am overwhelmed and then I am *bored*
I can feel the sense of confusion, and my soul became unrest. I must run, run and run inside my own thinking, ohh I started thinking about so many sophisticate things, the things on the sky which I can not reach. One by one ideal me, everything that is so ideal I want to achieve. I keep demanding to my own strength while my real so weak self is beginning affirm that this is over load. But in my uncomfortable heart I even became more anxious and then.... desperate.
I am a limited human being, even though many times I found my self with unlimited desires even passions but I am a human with the design of certain limitation and boundaries. So often, when I find myself so restless and keep seeking and seeking until I wore out and give up. Now, I am just laughing for my unconsciousness, I need rest anyhow! I need to stay silent and start giving up my own burdens to the Master. I can not deal with those kind of dilemmas by myself. Just stay a moment, smile and find out where I am now. Ahh I have been wandered so far, far away. Why didn't I realize it and be a little bit late, so busy and busy.
Just try to wake up in the morning to see and touch the young leaves and feel the coolness of morning dew with the tip of my finger. Stay silent in the presence of All Peaceful Master and deepen the steps into the stillness of reverence.
Sst! I need rest, yes I will take a time to rest and weep for my past until the relieves come.
Refresh, O Lord my humble soul!
No comments:
Post a Comment