An elder said...

O blessed soul, listen to this. Nothing you can say about prayer is enough. Because prayer never ends,... It is a discussion with God. I cannot tell you what a person feels while praying. One thing must be made known, and that is that the soul of the faithful one needs to pray endlessly. When the doxology ends, supplication begins. When supplication ends, requests begin. And then one starts all over again. When one prays he also remembers his wondering brother and prays daily to God for his illumination and that he may be blessed to find his way to salvation.

***

Archimandrite Ioannikos, An Athonite Gerontikon, p.350

not too much, nor too little

Looking at the cloudy day, and feeling the rising of the temperature today makes me expect the the delayed rain. It can be very exhausting actually especially in the mid-day. I stared out the window and I realize that many of my friends are going somewhere, to their hometowns. Yet it's still the first week of the semester break so praise God that I am still enthusiastic for what will come next!
Recently many things the Lord has allowed to happen and that makes me very glad. Yet, it is always in my mind to love the ordinariness of anything. I am not really sure if I am using a correct word for this. It reminds me of what my best friend said, "Be moderate, brother and don't loose your temper". A very wise instruction it is.
It's always gladsome to experience such exciting moments, those events which triggers our strong emotional responses. And as a youth, I find myself in kind of attraction to anything 'different', sensational or unusual. It might be called a uniqueness, but can also move beyond that, something really extraordinary. And I believe that everybody has this kind of uniqueness, they're awesome. Just like medicine, this might be good to refresh our minds to try or experience something new, but once it gets too much or if it happens to be too little, that can be harmful. These extremes can bring us into state of severe boredom because of its too high predictability or impulsive addiction, craving for the emotional sensations. In short, this makes me convinced that moderation is precious!

The Lord is very awesome because He gives us what we need very wisely and timely. Everything has its own time. A Time to weep, a time to smile. A time to walk among crowds and a time to be alone. A time to listen, a time to speak a few words. A time to labor, a time to rest. "Because it is the will of God Himself that all His faithful servants rejoice in good and grieve at sin." All is sufficient and 'moderate'!

Lord, Your Love always makes me amazed! Glory to Thee O Lord, for all things! Ameyn!

Gaze at You...

My elders taught me, when I was a youth, to cling to heaven and earth, lest I stumble. For a long time I remained a child, and for a long time I used to lean on the crutch that they gave me.

But once eternity flooded through me and I felt like a stranger in the world, heaven and earth snapped in two in my hands like a frail reed.

O Lord, my strength, how frail are heaven and earth! They look like palaces built of lead, but they evaporate like water in the palm of the hand in Your presence. Only by their bristling do they conceal their frailty, and frighten uneducated children.

Get out of my sight, suns and stars. Sunder yourselves from the earth. Do not entice me, women and friends. What help can I receive from you, who are helplessly growing old and sinking into the grave?

All your gifts are an apple with a worm in its core. All your potions have passed through someone's entrails many times. Your garments are a cobweb that my nakedness mocks. Your smiles are a proclamation of sorrow, in which your feebleness is screaming to mine for help.

O Lord, my strength, how feeble heaven and earth are! And all the evil that men do under heaven is an admission of feebleness and—infirmity.

Only someone strong dares to do good. Only someone who is nourished and watered with You, my strength, is filled with strength for goodness.

Only someone who sleeps in Your heart knows rest. Only someone who plows before Your feet will enjoy the fruit of his labors.

My childhood, nourished with fear and ignorance, came to an end; and my hope in heaven and earth vanished.

Now I only gaze at You and cling to Your gaze in return, O my cradle and my resurrection.

St. Nikolai Velimirovich, Prayers by the Lake:IV
c.f. FOCUS UNSW blog

morning walk

Our dorm is very busy recently, while we are in the time just before the semester break. The time is ticking so fast and it's like being in a hurry. I have just finished my intensive class of Statistics and some other activities, really only because of Lord's kindness that I might pass through them. There's no any other beautiful day but being with Faithful and Great Lord!

I take this special time to stop by here. I have not posted anything for a long time in this clumsy blog! But one song which I always chant here in my heart, The Lord is very faithful and merciful.

On the morning as I walked and looking at the green park, my youth friends with their energies, smiles and enthusiasm, I pondered in my heart. How the Lord loves us greatly. Sometimes in my ignorance I tend to think that it is what I do or what I have which matters. But the more I walk behind Him; I realize that his love is pure and unconditional. If all that's with me and all I 'have' are gone, what am I? My identity is not on those things, but hidden in Christ. Outside Him I can do nothing. It's in Him we move, we live and we have our being.

Life is pure gift from God. And He alone knows perfectly of who we are in Him. Yet it is my weakness which makes me think that I am this or that, and many times my life is not what I think. Lord, help me in all times to rely upon Your Holy Will, to act wisely and firmly without embarrassing and embittering others, those whom You love. You have shown us the Light, and our hearts can't stop to seek to be in Your Light. You have led us into Your Truth and our hearts are thirsty and hungry for Your righteousness. Being in You, my heart finds rest, and let it be so unto eternity. How gladsome it is that this life is not about me or what I can do or what I have, but that this life is about You and Your mighty love! Blessed be Your Holy Name, O Lord! Ameyn.

Holy is God!

The Lord reigns
He is mighty and wondrous
let all the nations and peoples
and all creation tremble
Even though I am crushed
and enemies oppressed me
The Lord reigns
His power never fails, stronger than death
Blessed be His name, now and always

The Lord reigns
let His servants rejoice
and bend their knees and hearts
beholding His glory and kissing His Holy Feet
so fragrant, so great
He shines, much brighter than sun

His greatness in Love, His greatness in Mercy
His greatness in Humility, His greatness in Gentleness
Great is the Lord!

He loves justice
and caring for the oppressed
He uplifts one and humbles the other
in each step, in each word, in each deed
Great is He and His love endures forever

His Mercy is abundant
O, Israel open your mouth that the Lord might fill with it
He remembers his covenant and be mindful of His beloved's weaknesses
He forgives and with His astonishing grace He wrapped your wounds
Set your hearts, minds, strength upon His Great Countenance,
Joyfully listen to and follow Him and abide in His commandments
Let His love heal you and purify you
because He is good!

Holy, Holy, Holy is The Lord God!